The Cowboy's Secret Baby Page 18

  Becca excused herself to eat lunch in Olivia’s office. Jenna looked after the girl with a laser-focused expression. “Did she say ‘baby’?”

  “Yes.” Elizabeth wished Jenna had come in a few minutes later instead of overhearing part of the conversation.

  “I thought I noticed a bump the last time I was here. Calvin,” Jenna surmised. After all, she lived at the McMann ranch, where he’d worked. “It doesn’t surprise me, then, that he’s disappeared.”

  “With Dallas away too, Hadley must have his hands full.”

  “Grey Wilson’s been helping. So have others. That’s one great thing about this town. People pitch in wherever needed. I wouldn’t have recovered so well after my divorce without my family here, my friends, including you.” She tilted her head to study Elizabeth. “And how’re you doing, friend?”

  “Coping. The kids came home early, but they’re not little anymore so we manage our days more easily than I used to. Once I nail down a regular sitter instead of the temps I’ve been using, we’ll be fine.”

  “I meant you, personally.”

  Jenna was one of her best friends, and she always sensed when there was a deeper issue. Elizabeth resisted the urge to put a protective hand on her stomach. Dallas had been right about one thing. That spring afternoon in May she’d been a Lizzie, more herself perhaps in that one day than she’d ever been—or thought of being—in her life. Now that Jenna had opened the door, Elizabeth decided to share her secret. Like Becca, Elizabeth needed counsel from someone she could trust. “Jen, I can’t keep this to myself any longer. Becca isn’t the only one who works here at Olivia McCord Antiques and is, um, pregnant.”

  Jenna gave Elizabeth a high five that she weakly answered. “Olivia and Sawyer are having another? Did she email you from Kedar?”

  “Not Olivia.”

  Jenna gaped at her. “You mean—you? Dallas?” Her eyes widened. “Are you serious?”

  “You warned me this was possible, Jenna, but I didn’t want to listen. Please, don’t tell anyone else. You and Becca, her for obvious reasons, are the only two who know. It’s early yet, and I haven’t told the kids. I made the mistake of letting them know too soon about the baby I lost last winter...so, this time I want to be sure everything will be okay.” She’d waited with Dallas, as well. Was still waiting, wise or not.

  “You said you used protection.”

  “Expired.”

  Jenna’s eyes widened again. “I have to say, this is mind-blowing, kiddo. I won’t tell, of course. Are you okay with this?”

  Elizabeth nodded. “I want this baby. So much.”

  “I understand.” Her eyes brimming, Jenna drew her into a hug. “What did Dallas say?” Elizabeth’s silence spoke volumes and Jenna eased back from their embrace. “You haven’t told him. Oh, Elizabeth.”

  “I’m waiting for the right moment. There’s so much going on with the rodeo, and he’s out of town...” The excuse sounded weak, even to her, but she already knew Dallas’s view of a wife and family. She doubted he’d changed his mind.

  “I don’t imagine it will be easy with a baby in the house again,” Elizabeth said, “and my three stair-step kids. Still, most of it will be familiar for me. For starters, I’ve given up sleep before. But Becca has no idea what she’s in for, and since Calvin deserted her—”

  Jenna glanced toward the office, where Becca could be heard sniffling and rustling the aluminum foil that had held her sandwich. “That girl must be out of her mind with worry.” She hesitated. “Do you know what she plans to do?”

  “That’s what we were talking about when you came in. She’s not sure. She’s considering adoption, but the only reason she’s worried is because she doesn’t want to lose her rights.”

  A determined glint appeared in Jenna’s eyes. “I may be able to help. As you suggested, Hadley and I have been having some serious discussions. He doesn’t quite see things my way yet, but I’m hopeful. This wouldn’t be the same as our using a surrogate, which I was reading about last night—my latest attempt to find a solution. This could be a way for us to have a baby that wasn’t from a stranger, and for Becca to know her child will be well cared for,” she said. “We’d be keeping the baby in our community.”

  “Like Finn and Annabelle adopting Emmie,” Elizabeth pointed out.

  “I’d have no problem letting Becca be part of her baby’s life.” Before Elizabeth could comment, Jenna headed for the office. “I’ll talk to her.”

  * * *

  WHEN DALLAS RETURNED from Denver the next day, he went straight to the McMann ranch, where he found Hadley mucking stalls in a foul mood. Maybe his argument with Jenna hadn’t ended. Or he was mad because Dallas had been gone so long.

  “Sorry you had to take over my job too, Hadley.” He wrested the pitchfork from his brother’s hands. Dallas preferred the chore to sitting by his mom’s bed all day feeling helpless or trying to allay his father’s anxiety, though he thought he’d helped some. “I would have come sooner. I wish I’d been able to, but I waited till Mom got out of the hospital.” He’d been away for a week.

  Hadley’s scowl lightened a fraction. “She doing okay now?”

  “Her heart failure’s a constant issue. She seems much better for now, and before I left, I hired an in-home caregiver. We’ll see how that works out. Should at least lighten the load on Dad. He looks run-down.” Dallas pitched a forkful of soiled bedding from the empty stall. “I finally talked to her doctor at length, and Millie’s condition is manageable so far. The doc says she’ll monitor her newest medications closely—and that we should keep Mom’s spirits up.”

  “I hope she does fine.” And still, something with Hadley seemed off.

  “She sends her best to you and Jenna. Again.”

  Hadley muttered, “Thanks, we’re going to need that. I understand better how she feels about another child, but Jenna’s come up with a new idea.”

  “What’s that?”

  “She spoke to Becca Carter. Came home from town yesterday all fired up. The girl’s pregnant—Calvin’s kid.”

  “Yeah, I knew.”

  Hadley went on. “I ever see him again, I’ll wring his neck.” He kicked an empty bucket, which clanged against the wall. Halfway down the aisle, Trouble startled in his temporary stall while his was being cleaned. Dallas heard the dun gelding whicker then spin around, as if hoping to escape whatever danger lurked nearby. A dull thud told Dallas the horse had bumped into the wall. “Easy, boy,” Hadley called, then, “Get this. Jenna wants to adopt Becca’s baby. I hate to dampen Jenna’s hopes, but what if we took the baby, then Calvin turned up again—accepted his responsibilities—and Becca wanted to make a family with him after all? I can just see those two coming to the house, taking that baby away with the court’s permission. That would break Jenna’s heart.” When the twins were smaller, Hadley had feared a similar outcome from his former in-laws, who’d wanted custody of their only grandchildren.

  “Not likely to happen, Hadley.”

  He scowled. “How do you know? You spend your life driving from one rodeo to the next, never staying long any one place—”

  “You mean the way you used to do?” His brother had been known as a drifter until he married his first wife, Amy, and even when he stayed, she’d probably expected him to leave. Then after she’d died, and he had the twins to care for, Hadley fell for Jenna. He hadn’t said a word now to welcome Dallas back. He had something else on his mind, something that involved Dallas?

  He pitched another forkful of hay into the wheelbarrow between them. “You got something to say, Hadley, say it. Unlike Calvin, I didn’t want to leave here, but I had to deal with the emergency at home. You said you understood. What was I supposed to do, keep punching cattle while my mother slipped away in that hospital and my father lost his mind? They’re my responsibility.”

  “Oh, yeah? I thought you were their
s.” He paused. “Mine,” he said.

  Dallas tensed. They were coming too close to those last days together in foster care. His heart raced. Before he could stop them, the bad memories rushed from the far recesses of his mind. Dallas heard that click of the lock again. Heard himself crying, begging for Hadley on the other side of that bedroom door.

  The words were torn from him. “I’m not a kid now. They need me. I already let them down by going on the circuit instead of settling down, giving them the grandkids they want so bad.” Which produced an image of Lizzie, the kisses she and Dallas had shared. His sense at the hospital that he’d somehow forgotten to have his own life, commit to someone, didn’t slow his pulse now. Neither did his realization that, yeah, he was falling in love with her.

  “What were you supposed to do?” Hadley repeated Dallas’s question. “Take care of business, that’s what. You and Calvin.”

  Dallas blinked. “What does that mean?”

  “When Amy and I filed for divorce, I thought that was the end for us. Then, weeks after we’d spent one night together for old times’ sake, she told me she was pregnant. I didn’t leave, Dallas. I stuck by her, put our pending divorce on hold, took care of her until the twins were born. I promised her we could try again after that to make our marriage work, but then she...didn’t make it through delivery and I was suddenly a widower, a single dad with two helpless little beings to raise.”

  “You’ve done a great job. I know that was a tough time for you.”

  “Yeah, but you know what? That’s life. That was being an adult, little brother. I love being a dad. I love being Jenna’s husband even when we don’t see eye to eye. I have no desire to pack my gear and move on again while you and Calvin—”

  “Me and Calvin? Whoa,” Dallas said, dropping the pitchfork into the wheelbarrow. What did all this have to do with him? “Why lump the two of us together? Twice now?”

  “You took care of your parents this past week—I admire you for that—but why haven’t you stepped up to the plate with Elizabeth Barnes?”

  Dallas’s heart stalled. “Lizzie? What’s happened? Is she still sick?”

  Hadley aimed another kick at the empty bucket. “If this thing with Jenna and Becca hadn’t come up, I would never have known.”

  “Known what?”

  Hadley turned away. “We were arguing last night about Becca and Jenna blurted it out—Elizabeth had told her. I shouldn’t lose my temper like this, but I just can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

  Dallas swung him around with a hard hand on his shoulder. “No, you don’t get to tar and feather me along with Calvin Stern—” He stopped and stared at Hadley, who stared him down. The implication hung in the air. What had Calvin asked him? Is your girlfriend pregnant too? “You mean—Lizzie?” He swallowed, hard.

  “She’s not some buckle bunny on the circuit you’ll never see again. Talk about responsibility.” Hadley raised his voice. “What the hell were you thinking? I’m disappointed in you, Dallas.” Hadley had played the big brother card. “What did you do to that woman?”

  Dallas’s jaw clenched. As if he’d had the wind knocked out of him, he fell back against the nearest stall door. He’d left town to help his mom, and he’d come back to this crisis Lizzie must have faced alone. Had she known before he left? And that was why she’d looked like she had some secret she never wanted to share? It was like Calvin’s question was a prophecy come true, but Dallas wasn’t about to explain that one afternoon in Lizzie’s house, her tears... His own weakness had gotten them in this fix. Not the best way to think about it but... “Hadley, I swear, I didn’t know. I had a right—and she didn’t tell me.”

  * * *

  THE CHILDREN WERE in bed at last, and Elizabeth collapsed on the sofa just as her cell phone rang in her pocket. She almost didn’t answer. It wasn’t her mother’s name that flashed on the screen, though. Dallas’s voice sounded as tightly strung as the wire on Clara’s fences.

  “Are you home?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m coming over.” Dallas must have been right outside, because he opened her front door as she pushed the button to end his call. And her heart sank. She’d guessed by his tone why he wanted to see her. With all her dithering about timing, her fears, she’d waited too long. Someone had talked.

  “I would have come sooner,” Dallas said, “but after being away so long I put in a full day’s work.” He stood in the center of the room, hands on his lean hips, his eyes cool. “Hadley says you have something to tell me.”

  Elizabeth could see a muscle knot in his jaw. “Jenna told him,” she murmured. In Barren, others might always be waiting for the next bit of gossip to spread, but she hadn’t expected Jenna to betray her confidence.

  “There was never any flu, was there?” he asked.

  “No, but at first I wasn’t sure about...the other.” She pressed a hand to her forehead. “Dallas, I didn’t want to think I was pregnant. Then I didn’t want to trouble you until I had to.”

  “Trouble me?”

  “I should have told you, I know that. But I...lost a baby last year, and I’ve been so afraid that might happen again. I wanted to feel more confident that it won’t before I said anything. Before we go on now, how is your mother doing?” Elizabeth added.

  The muscle in his jaw jumped again. “Better. Out of the hospital. I took off too fast to call you. Sorry, and once I was there, I never seemed to find the time.” Or maybe he hadn’t wanted to. He returned to the subject that involved him now as well. “I’m very sorry for your loss then, but yes, you should have told me. Instead, Elizabeth, I had to find out from my brother that you’re carrying my baby?”

  Dallas came closer, eyes blazing. “Why didn’t you tell me? Or did you not want me to know?” He waved a hand toward the stairs. “I was here long enough to take care of your three kids. I watched rodeo tapes with Jordan, read books to Seth, tried to connect with Stella, who’s having none of that, by the way. I was in this house for days while you hid the truth from me. That’s the same as lying.”

  “By omission,” she conceded. “Dallas, I didn’t intentionally mislead you.”

  “I think you did. You kept on talking about our rodeo plans, but you could never even say a few other words? Like, ‘Dallas, I’m pregnant. Help me.’” He stood in front of her and Elizabeth looked up into his angry eyes. “You trusted me with your children, but you didn’t trust me with the truth. I have to ask—what am I to you? What do you take me for? Just some guy you made one mistake with last May, someone who’s passing through and will be out of your life before summer’s over?”

  “You will be,” she pointed out. “You’ve never made any secret of the fact that you can’t wait to get on the road again.” She understood the worry he felt about that and his parents. “So, no, I didn’t expect you to be thrilled about the baby. And when you do go back to the circuit, have you thought about what would happen if you got injured again? How would that help your mother or secure your parents’ future?”

  “I won’t get hurt.” Except that hadn’t worked so well for him before.

  Elizabeth flung out a hand. Stubborn man. “You shouldn’t even ride in this local rodeo. The animals you’ve managed to acquire are inexperienced. No one’s ever tried to stay on them. Am I right?”

  “You let me worry about that. I promise not to get killed in front of you and your children.”

  His sarcasm made Elizabeth see red. “I hope not, but isn’t it time you faced reality? Riding bulls can’t last forever.”

  His mouth tightened. “No, and when that’s over, I’ll decide what else to do with my life. Maybe stock contracting, becoming a rodeo announcer on TV, getting more involved with a group that helps injured and disabled riders—I might even think about buying a ranch of my own. I’m not there yet. But right now my folks can’t live in that house much longer, even with the caregiver I hir
ed. Over time Mom will need more care—expensive care. When I’m through on the circuit, I can relocate them wherever I decide to settle or go home and find them a better situation in Denver, but I need to get back to rodeoing so I can afford to do that. I thought you understood why my first priority has to be my parents.” He drew a sharp breath. “But about this baby...what do you need from me?”

  Elizabeth stiffened. This wasn’t going any better than she’d expected. “I don’t need your money. And I haven’t asked you to stay, Dallas.” Her voice quavered. “Or to be part of this child’s life. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before Hadley did. Just go,” she said, “back to your rodeo career and all that prize money you intend to win. I have a job now too, and my three kids have support from Harry. If I need anything more, I’m sure my friends will help.”

  He gazed at her. “Know something? This isn’t about what I do. It’s not about me being the wrong guy for you, a cowboy who’s like some tumbleweed rolling over the ground. Isn’t that what you meant?” He didn’t give her a chance to answer. “You don’t much like rodeo, I get that, but it’s not really about me. It’s not even about this baby, is it? I’ve been wrong. I think you care more what the town gossips might say—”

  “That’s not true.”

  “—and about your standing in this community, including with your mother, than you do even about the children you already have.”

  Elizabeth winced. “That’s unfair. I don’t want them shamed—because of my behavior with you this time!” Her voice continued to shake. “But that’s on me. I had a rebound thing with you, Dallas. I shouldn’t have and that also wasn’t fair to you. One afternoon with a woman you barely knew, and now look.” She gestured at her still-flat abdomen.

  “Lizzie, I—”

  She turned her head aside. “I’ll see this rodeo of yours through because I promised my children.” She tried to steady her tone. “And hope the whole town doesn’t find out about us before it’s over.” She was trembling now, a leaf blown by the wind. “By the way, you have an interview with a reporter from the Barren Journal, and our TV station wants you on air.” She rose from the sofa, marched over to the door and flung it open. “I won’t be there, so you’re on your own. And so am I.”